Yes, but since your former husband will not listen to reason, you are going to have to let a judge hear the evidence and make some changes. The best interests of the child is the paramount consideration of the court in determining child custody and visitation, and if your former husband's conduct is causing the children emotional problems, that definitely is not in their best interests. Your case sounds similar to one decided by the Virginia Court of Appeals in 2003. In that case the children's father's conduct was causing serious psychological and emotional injury to the children. The evidence the court heard was that the children feigned illness to avoid visiting him, one child was visibly uncomfortable in his presence, the school performance of the other child improved when visits with him ceased, and the father actively attempted to undermine the children's relationship with their mother through his repeated condemnation of her as an adulterer and fornicator, telling the children she was going to go to hell, and referring to her as the devil. On those facts, the court concluded that continued in-person visitation with their father was contrary to the children's best interests.

Frequently Asked Questions

 


Q: My husband and I divorced, and I got primary physical custody of our two pre-teen children. Recently, the children complain that when they are staying at their father's he is too strict with them. Since the divorce he has been going to church quite a lot and this has changed his life for the better (he's not drinking anymore), but now he's trying to force his ideas on the children and talking to them badly about me because I do not hold the same beliefs as he does. The kids are at the point where they get upset with having to go see him. I tried talking to him about this but he said he's raising the kids according to what the Bible says, and that I am going to spend eternity in Hell if I don't change. He also said this to the children, and that really has them crying and upset. Is there anything I can do to stop this?

A: Yes, but since your former husband will not listen to reason, you are going to have to let a judge hear the evidence and make some changes. The best interests of the child is the paramount consideration of the court in determining child custody and visitation, and if your former husband's conduct is causing the children emotional problems, that definitely is not in their best interests.

Your case sounds similar to one decided by the Virginia Court of Appeals in 2003. In that case the children's father's conduct was causing serious psychological and emotional injury to the children. The evidence the court heard was that the children feigned illness to avoid visiting him, one child was visibly uncomfortable in his presence, the school performance of the other child improved when visits with him ceased, and the father actively attempted to undermine the children's relationship with their mother through his repeated condemnation of her as an adulterer and fornicator, telling the children she was going to go to hell, and referring to her as "the devil." On those facts, the court concluded that continued in-person visitation with their father was contrary to the children's best interests.


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